Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Easing My Insanity

I've thought about blogging for quite some time now, but have never really had much to say that I thought anyone would give two shits about reading. I have decided that this blog will be more about me helping myself than a place for people to come and get a good laugh or a new recipe.
After the last few weeks of feeling like I am in some kind of dark hole with no light, I have decided that this can be a place for me to talk to and/or about the one person who is no longer with me ... my Mom. I lost my Mom on October 7th after a very short bout with lung cancer. I'm finding it difficult to move forward because I need to talk to her every day. I probably called her three to five times a week just to tell her what was going on in our lives, ask what she did for the day, or maybe some little tidbit of gossip. I started calling her every few days after we lost my Dad in July of 2009. I guess it made me feel better to know she had someone to talk to every day. Maybe by writing down the things I want to tell her, I can begin to heal. 

Feel free to read if you want, comment if you like or just plain move along to something with a little more rainbows and sparkles. I'm sure that in time things will be better, but for now - it's all about me.

The first thing I need to start with is ... 

I miss you so much. I wish I could hear your voice but I guess this will have to do. Everything is working just how you had hoped. Remember how we talked about everyone getting along after you were gone. I think that for the most part, everything is going just fine. 

We had girls night because we thought it was best to keep things as normal as we could. We did a lot of laughing and crying but all in all, it was a good time. We went through all the quilts that night. You must have forgotten how many you had done. Everyone got one and there are still three more plus the one that is not quilted yet. I'm surprised that your fingers never calloused from all that embroidery.
Robyn handed out goody bags so it was almost like you were still there. We at and drank and were kind of merry. We did have to let the girls go through clothes and yes, there was some fun poked at you.

Even Whit got into the action.

In the end, some good did come from girls nite. We found all sorts of glasses that we were able to donate to the Lions Club (but not before taking a goofy pictures first).

That pretty much sums up our 1st "first" without you. I'll be back regularly to keep you posted in everyone's lives. One step at a time cuz you know ... "It is what it is"!



  1. Mom would be proud of your 1st blog...nice job.

  2. I frantically searched for video last night where she was talking...I've seen all the pictures. And I cried and I cried. It seems to be getting harder, not easier? It's like I'm totally questioning the meaning of life and everything I have done in my life up until now.

    Thanks for blogging, don't pull an Alissa on me.

  3. I had no idea you had started blogging. I'm excited for you. I believe blogging is a great way to learn about yourself and grow as a person. Afterall it usually comes straight from the heart with no white lies attached. I'll be following now.


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